Meal Choice for Weddings

This "be nice" post is for once not about brides behaving badly. It's more about giving yourself a break and maintaining your sanity. Specifically when it comes to feeding your wedding guests.

Whenever I meet with a new client, I always make sure to ask if they will be offering guests a choice of entrée on their response cards. And if they say yes, I go into a rage and berate them mercilessly. Just kidding. But I will take the time to explain why I think this isn't the best idea.

Literally all of the wedding planners I have worked with cringe at the mere mention of meal choice for weddings. And here's why:

• By making guests choose their dinner a month out, they will undoubtedly change their preference the day of the event. "I recently became vegetarian and can't eat the steak" or "I picked chicken, but that pasta looks really good" are very common.

• By offering a variety of dishes, you now become responsible for keeping track of who gets what. So in addition to obsessing over seat assignments, you now need to make sure that the wait staff gets wind of who wants what. It's about as fun as it sounds.

• Many venues and caterers offer options for "dual entrées" so if your Aunt won't eat anything that had parents, chances are she'll eat the vegetarian pasta conveniently located on the same plate. My husband and I chose a chicken and shrimp dual entrée for our wedding, and it worked out great. You'll never please 100% of your guests. But with the dual entrée, you'll come close.

• It's just one meal. Guests will forgive you if their favorite dish isn't on the menu. It's not a restaurant, after all. I don't expect to place special orders when I attend a wedding, and your guests will be no different. (And if you do anticipate your guests will be placing special orders, consider inviting different guests.)

You'll need to make around 3,946 decisions when planning your big day. Meal choice doesn't need to be one of them. Honest.